September 6, 2013 by jeliwobble
There are fewer more painful things in the world than finding a two-lug Lego brick with your foot in the dark. Since moving Smallest into Son’s bedroom, this is a fairly frequent occurrence. The genuinely best way of avoiding the Lego mine field is tiptoeing. That way, you’re less likely to put your whole weight down on the plastic nemesis all at once.
In a concerted effort to avoid future parental toe torture, it was felt within the Asylum that the owner of the room should tidy it. Big Mistake. Huge.
Because 6 year-old boys have no spatial concept and very few fine motors skills…apparently.
To whit, when asked to tidy said room of said small pieces of building materials, The Whine was started at medium volume almost immediately: ‘Buuuuuuuuut…’
We are old folk. We have great experience with The Whine. We know to cut it off the moment it starts with a hasty, pitched at a volume level one notch above The Whine, explanation as to why the tidying will happen, whether Son likes it or not.
The Whine was curtailed abruptly and was followed by another tried-and-tested tactic; the one we like to call I’m Playing, where tidying morphs into lining up the cars and bricks that are supposed to be going in the boxes so that when the unsuspecting parent returns to see how their little darling is doing, there are twice the number of articles on the floor as when ‘tidying’ commenced.
As previously stated, Old and Wise, Him Indoors also curtailed I’m Playing with a swift ‘Put the Lego in the Lego box!’.
Whereupon, ingenious to the last, Son comes out with a fairly new tactic that his sisters had failed to bring to the fore. This is one I like to call The Stoner Stare, the basic premise of which entails picking up any article off the floor and staring at it in bewildered wonderment, as if it was the first time one has ever seen such an amazing item. Son’s item of choice? A broken crayon.
Him Indoors didn’t deal well with The Stoner Stare. There are few things that rile Him Indoors, but blatant, unabashed stupidity is one of them. The was much wailing from both of them but my feet are finally safe.